My Best Buys!

I want to start a series about baby-care products that I really love, and think are useful or superior. Some of these I didn't find until I was on my second child, and I regret not having them earlier, others I found from the beginning (or had recommended to me) and I'm so glad I did!  My best buys will all be designed for the budget new-product buyer, because that's what I am, so items that are top-price but reasonable when used probably won't make this list.  I hope you will find this helpful!



BEST BUY: Carriers - The Beco Gemini

Being an amateur baby-wearer, I have owned a number of baby carriers over the years.  My very first carrier was a standard Baby Bjorn, a gift from my cousin to help me get up and out when I had a newborn baby.  I LOVED the Baby Bjorn, and used it to take my son to the aquarium, shopping, or just around the house...for about a month and a half.  Then, my big baby boy started to hurt my back, and carrying him was an exhausting experience.  Honestly, I expected that all carriers felt the same, and so I didn't really investigate other carriers until my son had outgrown the weight-limits of the Bjorn, by which time carrying him in my arms was far more comfortable than putting him in the carrier.

Then, I purchased a sling so that I could carry him on my hip, but it was also a back-ache waiting to happen.  I also tried a Mei-Tai, an Ergo, and a Moby Wrap, but none met my needs (the Moby Wrap's flaw, to it's credit, was that my children hated it - it fit me just fine).  Finally, when my son was about 11-months old, I found and purchased a Beco Butterfly II from an excellent online seller known as FrogMama (I especially love her return policy!).  This carrier was very comfortable, and pretty easy to use for a beginner back-carrier.  I still love that carrier, but the downside is that my son, used to facing forward in the Baby Bjorn, was not thrilled about having to face in in the Butterfly.  Also, the interior sling makes a back-carry much easier for the inexperienced baby-wearer, but it seems to get in the way and complicate things once back-carrying has been mastered.

When my daughter was born, I went looking for a carrier that would allow out- as well as in-facing, and I found the Beco Gemini (also available from FrogMama).  This is an awesome carrier.  It has a bunch of different, great features.  You can wear it in a hip carry, back carry, and front carry (both in- and out-facing, which distinguishes it from the Ergo), you can narrow or widen the crotch area depending on the size of the baby and the type of carry (no infant insert needed), and you can lower or raise the neck support.  You can also cross the straps on your back or wear the carrier back-pack style depending on what is most comfortable for you, and it has the added hip support that is missing from the Baby Bjorn to make everything that much easier on your back.  You can carry a child from 6-35 pounds, which means it will work for at least two years for the average child (my two-and-a-half year old is in the 60% for weight and I can still carry him comfortably)!  It runs around $130 (compared to the Ergo, which runs $115-$160 depending on the style, or the Babyhawk Oh Snap, which is solidly at $150), but you can sometimes find it on sale.

Cons?  Just a couple.  First, if you have a short (in length) baby, you may find that they are physically ready for the out-facing carry long before they are tall enough to fit in the carrier out-facing, which can be irritating.  Also, the carrier only seems to come in very dark colors, so if you have a household like mine that is filled with animal hair, or your baby is prone to spitting up, your carrier will rarely look sparkling clean even when washed regularly.  But despite these cons, I still believe the Beco Gemini to be the best carrier out there, and I would recommend it to anyone.



Please note that although this carrier does offer out-facing front-carry, that is NOT the recommended way to carry a child, as that particular carry is hard on a baby's back, and so such a carry should never be used for extended periods of time. 

Why Won't This New Mom Wash Her Hair?

Click here to read a really interesting article about "the fascinating postpartum customs of women from around the world," by Rebecca Tuhus-Debrow.

For Women's Eyes Only

If I have any male readers (at this point, I am not even sure I have any female readers!) then I apologize in advance, but this posting is targeted at a female audience.

On a personal feminine note, after I began cloth-diapering, I also began noticing how much waste I was producing myself as a woman.  Diapering is not the only way to go cloth.  Breast-feeding moms probably already know that in addition to all of the disposable breast pads, several companies also offer "reusable" breast pads, although they can be harder to find.  Some of these are not nice quality at all, but I really like the Avent-brand reusable pads (I have never used FuzziBunz pads, although I know they make them).  They are soft, absorbent, easily washed and dried, and like cloth diapers, you'll need to change them a bit more often and they are expensive up front but cheaper in the long run.  You can find them at Babies R Us, and I highly recommend them.

All women, whether or not we are moms, use a product very similar to disposable diapers on a regular basis.  Pads and tampons clog our toilets and fill up our landfills at an alarming rate.  So why isn't anyone talking about it?  Probably because the discussion is at best taboo and at worst disgusting to people.  But there actually are green options available to women who don't want to clutter up the landfill (with diapers or pads)!  For women who prefer tampons, I recommend something called the Diva Cup.  I have personally never used one (I don't like tampons, either), so I spoke to a couple of my green friends.  They love them!  It is a one-time expense, without worrying about clogging the toilet, filling the landfill, or overnight leaks.  Easy to use and comfortable to wear, I am assured, although one friend added the caveat that it is probably a better product for women who have had sexual experience, as that will make it easier to insert and remove.

For women who prefer the pads-route (such as myself), there are cloth pads not dissimilar to cloth diapers.  There are actually many brands available, so I won't name them all, but I personally prefer FuzziBunz and Happy Heiny's (another brand known for their diapers) over brands such as Glad Rags and Sckoon Organic.  They are comfortable, very absorbent, easy to use without bunching, and have all of the other qualities of a good cloth diaper.  I keep a small covered trash can next to the toilet and put the pads in there when I change them.  Then I throw them in with my kids' cloth diapers, washed with the same detergent on the same cycle in the same temperatures.  They can be dried in a dryer or on a line.  I don't have much trouble with staining, and I have actually had less leaking than when I used plastic pads (I suspect because I change these more often).  So easy, and so much better for the planet!

We're Back!

We took a bit of a break, first because I had nothing to write, and then because I could not be inspired to write.  The Great Tohoku Earthquake (followed by the massive Tsunami that changed hundreds of thousands of people's lives forever) shook my world as well as Japan.  I will not go into detail about myself, since I did not set this blog up to be a diary for myself, but it is suffice to say that I speak Japanese, I lived in Japan for a period of time before I was married, and I have many Japanese friends.  I dream of one day returning there with my family to share the land and the culture that I love with my children. 

Watching the footage of the Tsunami sweeping through the towns of Tohoku was heart-rending for me.  The streets looked familiar - they could have been a couple of blocks over from where I lived.  The suffering of the people is beyond my comprehension, and when I think about the fact that mothers lost children and children lost parents, I feel sick.  I can't even bring myself to think about all of the animals that are searching for their families (I have 3 dogs, and they were my babies before I had babies), and the nuclear disaster which has gotten so much alarmist press over here but which continues to ruin the livelihoods of Japanese farmers over there.  I can't really articulate these feelings, and actually, I don't want to.  But it has been very difficult for me to write about the insignificant issues and complications of parenting while there are parents out there searching for their babies. 

Please click the following link to visit the website of The American Red Cross and donate what you can afford to give to help the people of Japan.  The disaster isn't over the moment it ceases to be 24-hour news.  Thank you.

Washing Cloth Diapers

Every parent has a different way of cleaning their cloth diapers, and many different brands of cloth diapers come with specific instructions, as well.  This is how I clean my diapers, and thus far, it is working for me.  For parents who are new to cloth diapers, I hope these tips will be helpful.  I also HIGHLY recommend you check out The Diaper Jungle's website.  I don't agree with everything she says, but it's all useful!

I keep a bucket in my child's bedroom, next to the changing table for soiled diapers.  When my kids were eating breast milk exclusively, I would even toss poopy diapers in the bucket, because breast-milk waste breaks down in water.  My daughter is now taking some solids, though, and my son is entirely on solids, and so poopy diapers go inside out into a bucket filled with water (my daughter) or the poop gets dumped (along with a flushable insert) into the toilet and then the diaper gets tossed in the bucket with everything else (my son).

Flushable diaper liners are a wonderful invention.  They make cleaning up poopy diapers so much easier, since all you have to do is dump and flush, often leaving diapers clean enough to toss into the regular diaper pail!  They also enable parents to use Desitin and other diaper-rash creams with cloth diapers, since zinc-oxide-based creams RUIN the absorbency of cloth diapers.  But a diaper liner protects the diaper from the cream while you protect your baby's bum with the cream.  As an added bonus, they're biodegradable!  There are lots of brands to choose from, but my favorites are the Real Nappies brand.

When it is time to do laundry, dump the dry pail of  soiled diapers right in, and pull the poopy diapers out of the wet pail (do not dump the poopy water into your washer - dump it into your toilet).  I use tongs to pull the poopy diapers out of the water, because I'm wussy about getting my hands dirty, but you don't have to.  Then, spray Bac-Out or sprinkle Baking Soda in the bucket to deodorize and prepare for the next batch of dirty diapers.  Try to stay away from chemicals like Lysol or bleach, which can irritate your child's skin and break-down the diaper fibers.

I prefer run a rinse load first, to get the dirty out of the diapers so that stuff isn't in the water when I start washing.   Then, run your regular load of laundry, making sure to use diaper-safe detergent.  Standard laundry detergents such as Tide carry several risks for cloth diapers.  The first and most obvious is chemicals and fragrances, which may be what you are trying to escape by using cloth.  If this is your only concern, then Free & Clear options may seem like a good choice, but beware.  The petroleum found in these detergents (that's right, Tide and other detergents are made of oil) gives clothing a protective coating, and so over time it "seals" the diaper, making it less absorbent.  Petroleum-free detergents are not only better for the environment, but also better for your cloth diapers (which are better for the environment!)^[*]#5  There are detergents that are plant-based and petroleum-free like Seventh Generation and Method detergents (available at Target and Babies R Us), detergents that are highly recommended for cloth diapers, such as Charlie's Soap, and there are even detergents designed specifically for cloth diapers, such as Rockin Green or Bum Genius Diaper Detergent.  I love Charlie's Soap because I can use it on my children's clothes as well as diapers, and it is much less expensive than the detergents designed specifically for cloth diapers.

During the wash cycle or the final rinse, I add 1-2 cups of regular white vinegar.  Standard white vinegar (Kroger and Walmart both sell it by the gallon) is the cloth diaperer's secret weapon.  Add it to the wash or rinse cycle, and add some to the poop bucket when you have a diaper soaking in it.  It works as a natural fabric softener and deodorizer, without any harsh chemicals or fragrance.  I have never had a problem with my washer or diapers smelling, and I credit this trick!  NEVER use chemical fabric softener on your cloth diapers.

Many cloth diaper brands, such as Bum Genius and FuzzBunz, instruct you to wash their diapers in hot water.  Hot water can help to expand the fibers in cloth diapers, so I always recommend running your first couple of loads with new diapers on hot.  You do not, however, have to wash your diapers on hot continuously, as modern detergents do not clean any more efficiently in hot water, and washers do not normally get hot enough to kill off dangerous germs or bacteria, anyway (160-170 degrees Fahrenheit is considered the standard temperature needed to kill E. Coli, for example, and energy and baby experts both recommend you keep your water-heater set around 120 degrees).  Most dirty diapers do not carry harmful bacteria such as E. Coli, and so disinfecting isn't a concern (more on that below) unless you know your child has a serious bacterial infection.  I do not like to encourage the use of bleach, but if you know your child has a bacterial infection or a very serious case of food poisoning, you may want to consider running a bleach rinse of your washing machine after washing cloth diapers in order to clean out the tub of your washer before the next load goes in.  Do not mix bleach with the cloth load, as it will break down the fibers in your diapers.

I am a particularly cautious Mama, and so I always run a secondary rinse on my children's clothes and cloth diapers after the wash cycle (which includes its own rinse cycle) has completed.  This makes certain that all of the detergent is rinsed out of the diapers, because even environmentally-safe detergents can be irritating to the skin.

Finally, it is time to dry the diapers.  Both a dryer or hanging the diapers in sunlight will not only dry the diapers, but also disinfect them.  Sunlight is the natural world's bleach, as it removes staining and smells and also has antibacterial properties, and the dryer DOES get hot enough to kill off most germs and bacteria, so either method will sanitize your diapers for Baby's bum.  If you use the dryer but discover that your diapers are stained, set them out in the sun for a day, anyway, and they'll clear right up.  If you decide to hang-dry your diapers, you may want to run them through the dryer briefly on air-fluff afterward just to soften them up a bit.  This will use less energy than drying them entirely in the dryer, with the same results!

心に春がいる

I am going to stray from my usual parenting discussions for this post, just because the beautiful weather lately has inspired a "natsukashii" or nostalgic feeling in me.  My Japanese is a bit rusty, but this is the general idea.  If you cannot read the characters, install a Japanese program on to your computer.  I promise that, for the next post, I will return to our usual programming.

さくら　さくら　　　　Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms
野山も　里も　　　　　Over fields, mountains, and countryside
見渡す　限り　　　　　As far as you can see
霞か　雲か　　　　　　Mist or a cloud?
朝日に　匂う　　　　　Fragrant in the morning sun
さくら　さくら　　　　Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms
花　ざかり　　　　　　Flowers in bloom

さくら　さくら　　　　Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms
弥生の　空は　　　　　Across the Spring sky
見渡す　限り　　　　　As far as you can see
霞か　雲か　　　　　　Mist or a cloud?
匂いぞ　出ずる　　　　The fragrance wafts out
いざや　いざや　　　　Go, go
見に　行かん　　　　　Go to look, finally

Eating Out with Kids

The BBC recently ran an interesting article about eating out with your children, entitled Toddlers in restaurants - a social battlefield.  For any mother or father of young children, this article doesn't present any new information, but it is comforting to know that I am not alone in the stress of trying to eat out with little ones.  The references to family-friendly restaurants is irrelevant to those of us not living in the U.K., but the advice is good.  I have reprinted it below, as well as a couple of my own personal tips and tricks:

• Go to a restaurant that won't stress you or the kids out
• Go when the toddlers are not too hungry
• Take a stash of books or small quiet toys
• Try and sit away from the romantic couples
• There is safety in numbers
• If your children cannot be quieted take them outside until calm is restored
• Source for above information: Katie O'Donovan, Mumsnet (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-12440906)

• Choose low-traffic times to go out, such as lunches, early dinners, and week nights
• Choose a restaurant with good service or a short wait (buffets are great for kids)
• Don't be afraid to use the Time Out - even in public.
• Ask for to-go boxes and the check as soon as your food is served, so that in case of emergency, you can get out efficiently
• Never underestimate the value of carry-out